There will always come a time in life when a good road leads to a bad situation. While the specifics of the trial vary from person to person, all of the trials create mental, emotional, and sometimes physical side effects that become a heavy burden and creates an unhealthy lifestyle.
But when a road leads to these situations, no matter what the particular circumstances may be, there are always ways to handle them that will prove to have a positive outcome. By using healthy ways to handle these situations, any person proves him- or herself to be stronger and better off in the end.
Help yourself before helping others
Sometimes when you get in an unhealthy situation, such as trying to help a friend who is in desperate need of your time to help heal their struggles, you can become so involved in that other person’s life that you forget to take care of yourself. You end up doing everything you can for them, but never take a few minutes to think about yourself. Selflessness is not a bad characteristic to have, but it can be detrimental to your wellbeing if you do not remember to take care of yourself before taking care of others.
Establish a line between what you can and can’t handle
Being selfless isn’t just a trait, it’s a responsibility taken on to help others. With a responsibility as big as this one, it is easy to neglect the responsibility for knowing what you can and can’t handle. If you are involved in caring for someone, and the situation begins having a large toll on you mentally, emotionally, or even physically, it may be time to take a step back and rethink your approach.
Adjust your behavior to be proactive, not reactive
Some situations may cause you to be angry or even hurtful on a regular basis, even if that’s not how your personality truly is. Unfortunately, this happens for numerous people, and after months, or even years, of being immersed into their situation, they become irritable with all who come into their lives. Instead of letting this happen, learn to be proactive. When sometimes bad happens or a situation becomes worse or more complicated, learn how to put a positive spin on what is happening and do something to make it better, rather than getting angry right away.
Let the other person in the situation know how you’re feeling
Just because someone is hurting, it doesn’t mean that it is OK for them to cause you to be hurt, as well. If you are in a situation where helping someone is causing you to hold a burden on your shoulders and starts to wear you down, tell that person how you’re feeling and work together to find a way to resolve the situation for both of you. After all, there is no work like teamwork.
Seek help, if needed
No matter how much we want to help those we care about the most, sometimes, it just can’t be done alone. If you start recognizing that all of your effort is going nowhere and your relationship with this person is becoming more burdensome than loving, it may be time to go to someone for help. It could be your parents, a counselor, or maybe another friend who understands where both of you are coming from. Just make sure to not put your feelings on the wayside.
No matter how old you are or who your friends are, there will always come a time when a mutual friendship can become an emotionally-draining relationship. Instead of letting this take a toll on you and your loved one’s friendship and overall states, construct a plan to mend your trials in a healthy way.